Tuesday, June 29

in the blink of an eye...



well i had to go and do it,
i had to count the days left of being with Our #1,
and now of course i wish i had not.
for the number of days is way, way too little for me to grasp.
the thought of Our #1 leaving the nest has played heavy upon my heart and my mind over the past few months.
some days it takes me by surprise,
out of nowhere comes a little voice, reminding me less i forget the time is drawing close...
and with it,
i feel like the very breath within my soul has been taken.


so with that being said i need to take a little time,
we will not necessarily be doing anything in particular,
just hanging around the shed together.
perhaps a bit of thrifting for old times sake...
lordy how i will miss my thrifting buddy.

she will be busy packing up her belongings
i will be busy trying to finish up her blanket per her request
and all the other 'lappity lap' blankets that keep asking to be made...


i am thinking over the next seven days i will spend my thoughts wisely,
telling myself how really, despite it feeling like the end,
it is truly just the beginning of a new chapter for her and for me

she will be back with a 'skip in her step' soon ~ Tif

61 comments:

French Knots said...

Oh Tif, I can't imagine how hard it must be as one of your children prepares to fly the nest.Keep your chin up Missus.x

~ The Jolly Bee ~ said...

I can totally relate....I'm just back from freshman orientation with my number one child as well. He heads off to college in August. I cried my way through days of parent meetings and I just grabbed him in a big bear hug and couldn't stop sobbing. This is getting bad.

Marie said...

My oldest is 25 and youngest 11...I sooo understand <3
I am so proud of the oldest one for making his way in the world and I know your daughter will do just
fine...
:)

Bobo Bun said...

How I hate change and this is one big change for you, one all us parents know is coming. Have a blast having the best time with your loved one and good luck getting that blanket finished to wrap her in.

Bobo X

Debby said...

The first week or so is not good but it does get easier. I remember I was just recovering when she called and said she was coming home to visit. If she is close enough to visit it helps. My sons weren't and that was hard. It is fun to experience your children as adults and making their own decisions. Good luck......it will be okay.

winnibriggs said...

Believe you me, they are never 'gone', both mine left for university, one set up home miles away for a couple of years. They both returned and No 1 stayed until he was 37 !! and No 2 is still with me, plus partner and now grandson, and she is almost 39!!. They are soon to move away, but they will still be 'here'. Don't be sad, it's just another phase in yours and their life.

**WE BLOG ARTISTS** said...

oh...I am not looking forward to that day when our little ones grow up into ladies and wish to flee the nest...but you're right, it's a new chapter and she is surely very excited...this is the time your relationship will strengthen and grow with her in different ways...
HUGS...big HUGS
Char.x

Ruth P. said...

I felt that way the summer before my #1 left for university. She left (four hours away), and then came home every weekend. And didn't officially move out until she was 24. It was great!

Elizabeth said...

Take heart Tif, I am someones #1 and here I am nine years after I first left with my own little house a short mile and a half away from my parent's nest. And the truth is I can't imagine not being around that nest now.

Ann said...

Don't worry Dottie - it won't be as bad as you think, and of course she will be back. My sister lives in a different country and her visits seem to come round sooner rather than later these days!

Roxanne said...

Your #1 is clearly a very lucky gal to have such an amazing mom. Take comfort in that fact that you taught her, and taught her well. She'll always follow the road back to the shed. Good luck to her!

raining sheep said...

It is hard when children fly the nest...I have been there. But it is so exciting to see how much they keep of what we have given them throughout their time with us, and all the new stuff that shapes them into adulthood.

Patricia said...

Yes, you go and enjoy just 'being' in the moment with your #1. Let this time saturate your very soul then the memories will stay deep within, never to be lost.

Happy crocheting that precious blanket :)

jenandbrett8 said...

oh Tif, I feel your pain and my heart goes out to you. I am a empty nester now, and luckily enough our children are all back in the same town. I see the youngest one most days for a few minutes as she drops off her babies for nan to look after while she is one the first half of her split shift as a head chef. I have to add that the babies all have four legs and a tail.
Our number one left home at 19 to work for a year as a nanny just outside Chicago, it was so hard to see her go, not only to a new country but one on the other side of the world, from a country town in Australia to the US was a big move. She didn't know a soul, no friends or family near by, but you know what she did a great job, came back a grown woman, she went on to study for childcare, this time only 2 hours away and was home on the weekends. She has kept going and now looks after women and mainly children that have been in a domestic violent situtation.
Enjoy the time that you have with her before she goes, knowing that you have brought up a strong and loving individual, when she returns she will still be your daughter but also your friend.
Jen

SRA said...

Dear Sweet Dottie Angel....

Know that all the places your #1 may go that you cannot go too...that God walks in your place, guiding, embracing, protecting, and loving. They're in good hands. No worry Mama Angel!

Michelle said...

Just gorgeous pics Tif...
Thinking of you...and your new chapter...
just keep strong...
all will be peachy...

nacherluver said...

Ouch! I can only glimpse your anguish. My eldest is entering his junior year in High School. Hoping you peace for your life transition.

Victoria said...

Time goes by so fast, it takes the breath away. I remember going through this a few years back with our #1. At the time it was so hard for me, but now looking back, I am so in awe of how she has stretched her wings... the wonderful things she has experienced... the person she has become on her own... and it's a wonderful, joyful sight to behold. Good luck to you and yours on this new chapter.

paperbird said...

so beautiful here- i love these images.

Frances said...

All your thoughts are so beautifully expressed!

Best wishes to you and yours. xo

Susanne said...

On the 20 hour car trip to bring my daughter to college I'm panicking, I have mere hours left to impart all my knowledge upon her! OMG! What have I neglected to tell her that she needs to know?! I'm sure on the outside, I appeared cool as a cucumber!
Have a great summer together and good luck,
Susanne.

Angela (Posy Moe) said...

Ah yes, my number one will be gone on August 5th. I have not counted the days, and will not. I will simply hug her and laugh with her every day that we have before she is off. Then I will count the days until she comes back home next.

Always count the days til return, never til gone.

xoxo

Jacqueline said...

We raise our babes to meet this moment with confidence and bravado, and the terrible deal we strike with love is that we are the ones left feeling a bit lost, and unprepared to absorb the magnitude of it.

My number one launched a few years ago, and number two, who will soon follow his sister's flight path, can barely be contained! I find it exquisitely painful, and very exciting all at the same time -- grief and celebration.

You have given her a most beautiful nest from which to fly, Tif. And I have no doubt that she has the most intricate and divine wings! She will land safely.

Savor this time with your girl, and be gentle with yourself. A bazillion hugs coming your way ... and an endless supply of virtual, chocolate bikkies!! xx

elsy said...

it gets easier with time.....my eldest is just about to return after a year at uni....with only a couple of visits home.....its just something your mind and soul adjusts to.

Charity McAllister said...

My poor dear Tif! When one little bird is ready to fly, we Mama birds are quite blue. But rest-assured. When they spread their wings and soar with the wind, they will come back; many times with a nest and eggs all their own.

The Hobbit said...

I too have walked in those very same footsteps that you are so dreading.All will turn out for the best which you know in your mind but, your heart needs to catch-up.I have no chicks left in my nest but,last weekend the youngest and I picked 24 pounds of strawberries which we canned,froze and oh yes ate.You'll have more tale to tell of your adventures with #1 probable sooner that you think.

Claire said...

Hey Tif, what an interesting chapter in your life at the moment. I can empathise with your feelings as No. 1 son is now 19y.o. and who knows when he will decide to spread his wings and fly the nest!
That will leave just hubby and I at home, the place will be quiet, no music blaring from his room.
We have to let them go and take their rightful place in the world, but always knowing that they take a piece of our heart and home with them.

Tonya said...

Although I am nowhere close to this point I can imagine it would be both a happy and sad day to see your oldest leave the nest. I wanted to wish you well as you cope with this change.
.... and I also wanted to say how lovely those pillows are quilts are.

Katie said...

Oh my, you've made me tear up! I feel like my heart will break forever when my #1 leaves the nest, and he's only 2 years old!! Maybe by the time he's old enough, I will feel better about it...? Or maybe not. I hope your new chapter with her is lovely. :)

paisley and lace said...

My number one and bestest thrifting buddy moved away today. I spent the evening finishing up a blanket she, too, requested. Somehow it soothes my soul to spend my love in making a simple something for my little girl all grown up.

Jo Archer said...

I know how hard it is, but the best thing you can do for your children is to raise them to be independent and secure enough to make their own way in the world. (Oh and giving them cash. Lots of cash! lol)

Is she coming back to old blighty?

Little Ted Canvas said...

Oh my goodness that must be hard...but you're right, chin up look on the bright side as it is a new & very exciting chapter for her & the beginning of lots wonderful new adventures...that looks like the perfect setting to be hanging out with your #1, enjoy the moments!

Amanda said...

Wish I could give you a hug, Tif. Lots of love, Amanda xx

Claire Gale said...

ah how sad, enjoy xx

Jill said...

I COMPLETELY understand the feeling. I didn't think I could be so horribly sad and incredibly proud and happy at the same time. Then I realized I wasn't crazy, I was just a mom.

La Dolce Vita said...

that is the ONLY way to look at it!

Carol said...

Oh Tif, such a moving post. Don't fret, she'll be back in the shed lickety spit!
Love the photos today too.
Carol xx

Christine said...

Here's hoping, for the both of you, that New Nest is pretty close to Present Nest. Best to all!

Dajda said...

My thoughts are with you, Tif!

NatureGirl said...

Miss Angel, I can relate to losing a daughter to college and adulthood. It is not easy at all. My oldest girl left last August for her first year away at college, which was a three hour drive. I missed her alot, and she missed me too. But with e-mail and free weekend phone calls, we kept in touch. Now she is home for the summer as not only my oldest daughter, but my best friend. Best wishes for you to adjust to life without her and best wishes that she makes new friends and has a good college experience. Your kindred spirit, NatureGirl

Christina said...

This is a big transition for you both. Make everyday important and then let her taste independence. She will love you for it!

Anonymous said...

dear tif,

I live in NZ and have just had a total schmozzle of a morning. I have just sat down and read all of your thrifting posts as I share your addiction! Thanks for brightening this little corner of the globe! Have a wonderful day, alice

magpie chic said...

Ooh I do so feel for you Tif, having recently been through this myself with number 1 and then number2. It's so hard to start with. My one compensation was that they both allowed me to makeover their rooms after they had gone. And it was a big help in the separation I think, for me anyhow.
Thinking of you.
Love Jacqui

dottie angel said...

oh my dearest readers you always are there to pick me up and dust me down... thank you kindly for making feel okay with feeling the way i feel. i am doing the right thing, just like you suggested, i am looking forward and hopefully 'forward' means a visit in december. for old blighty is faraway and visits will be few and far between :)

randi said...

i know exactly how you feel! it is hard to take that 1st step of saying good-bye, but i will admit that i love the relationships i have with my two girls. so nice to move into "friend" phase!

Sharon said...

You're doing the good things now that mean so much later to children - paying attention, living a creative life, carving out time for fun. After a bit of larking your No. 1 will want a return visit just to steep in those familiar comforts. Enjoy your holiday!

cinback said...

Hello, I found your lovely blog via sfgirlbybay and I am so glad that I did!
This day is coming all too soon for me too. Trying not to think about that now... I love your idea of making a blanket to send along. I made Little Mermaid and pooh Bear blankets for my girls when they were toddlers and they both still have them, but it would be great to now send them off with 'grown up' blankets!

Anonymous said...

I love you Mummy. I don't always read your blog (:P) but I think I was supposed to read this one, and some of the other 'Counting the Days' ones. You're the best Mum I could have asked for. I hope you know you mean the world to me and you truely are my bestest of best friends. I'll miss you a lot! So much. But I'll be seeing you more often than you know and be thinking about you even more.
Love,
Number 1

spudballoo said...

Oh goodness, this did make me weep. i'm a fervent, secret lurker here. But this post made me brave. My boys are young (4 and 3) although I am not (39). I was Grown Up when I had children and I'm often wistful for my days 'alone' when I could do as i wish. Plus my boys can be rather tough, as small children can. No one seems to be able to listen, put their shoes on, their coats on etc never mind even get themselves a drink. It feels pretty relentless right now and I'm weary. Weep.

But then I read your post and I know I will pine for these days when they can't get enough carries or cuddles. When I know everything and can solve every problem. When i AM their circle of influence and being at home with me is better than anything else in the world.

Soon enough it will all change and I'll be weeping because my babies are grown and starting their own lives.

So, for now, I'll put my grumbles aside and cuddle my little boys. For soon they will be men and I'll just be plain old mum.

Spud from the UK

xx

Kristi said...

i am 33 and need my mama more now then ever before. i love all the lovelies your creating for her.

Regina said...

Thinking of you this morning. I'm in a different stage of transitions but I can imigine the many different emotions running through as thesay gets closer. In a coupleof days her beautiful reminder that she is in your thoughts even ifnot within eyesight. Many blessings.

Francesca said...

sending hugs across the pond. xxx

kt said...

sending you mom strength!
kt

Jill said...

Tif,
I am not a mother, so I can't totally identify with how you are feeling, but I can imagine how hard it must be. I am, however, a daughter that moved across the country entirely (from Wisconsin to New Mexico) and I want to tell you that because of that I am closer to my mom than I ever was when I was living there. When you live far apart, neither one of you can take the little time together for granted, so you make a point to use it well. I call my mom all the time to just talk, which I never did when I lived close by. I know it is hard to think of these things and imagine how it will ever work out, but I have confidence that it will. She'll still need you - we always need our mothers! And I can only imagine the fantastic care packages you will be sending her! I hope you make some wonderful memories together these last days together.
~Jill

val said...

Oh Tiff, I really feel for you. I hope you can enjoy every minute you can and then plan other ways of being "together" in the months to come...... little notes, pressed flower posies in the post, scraps of fabrics made into something especially deliciously Tiff-like, recipes hand written on tea stained paper, pictures of home. Then you too will receive your "something specials" in return!
For me at the moment, I have had to leave my youngest son, beautiful daughter-in-law and baby grandson, and move to a different county .... so I know a little about how you feel.
Bless you!
Val

Mia said...

Dearest Tif! Do enjoy these last few days you have with your eldest (at least for some time to come). Yet I do have to admit that I am looking forward to your return to Blogland again!

I have found inspiration from your lovely "extraordinarily ordinary" blanket and the pretty edging (with the picot stitch), and have made one similar on my blanket. I have shown it in my blog today, and have linked to yours. I hope this is OK with you.

emily said...

I am just meeting you and am loving your love for the blankie. I too am a fan. Though I lack a relationship with a Mr. Hook, I am blessed by what I have accumulated from others' dedication to the craft. And just a note to wrap yourself up in something soothing whenever the need rises as you are in this place of letting go. I just sent my 14 year old off to a month long camp and this small slice of letting go is plenty for now.

quiltygal said...

My number one flew the nest 2 years ago she moved from Australia to Wales (before that she had trouble getting to town!! ) I am off to see her on Sept 4th cant wait the only awful thing will be leaving her there when I have to come home such a long way..& so expensive to visit...enjoy your thrifting time ...

Ulla V. said...

Just sending you understanding thoughts about your 1st one leaving home.

Our daughter left home 2 months ago, and I still miss her badly. It is as if something has been ripped out of my chest.
But on the other hand I'm so proud of her and the way she is coping with her new life.

heather said...

oh my goddess. i can hardly read this, but i am, and i cry. how do we do this, letting our babies go? no choice i guess is how. mine are still little, but it is going by at lightening speed.

i am a new visitor here. i LOVE your funny light beautiful blog. inspires me to take a walk with the light, if it is a choice! it is, i am just such a drama addict, i gravitate toward the dark a lot sometimes. so much to ponder there, or something!!

samantha said...

Oh, this is exactly the sort of blog I have been searching like mad for. I love white houses with sweet knitted and cut homemade things in them. You are exactly the sort of mother I would hope to be someday.